Recently, I decided to become proactive about overcoming my anxiety disorder, and one of the things I decided to do recently was give up social media completely. I noticed how much of the things I scrolled past made me feel bad. I became so overwhelmed by my inbox that I eventually quit responding to everyone altogether. I haven't figured that one out yet, but I decided it was best to get away from it completely for a while. This decision led me to some self-reflection through meditation and other things. In this time, I learned some important things about myself, and I suddenly felt a sense of awareness I hadn't felt previously. The most important thing I took away from all of this is how impermanent time truly is. But if given enough time, and an allowance and acceptance of pain and discomfort that comes with change and growth, the bad times won't last forever, and it'll be worth it in the long run. I'd been escaping the present any way that I could because it seemed more comforting to hang onto feelings of the past than to face new feelings and new experiences. This isn't a good way to be, and that became clear to me.
That said, this whole shift inspired me to create something that could illustrate that. I spent an afternoon creating improvised loops with my guitar and sampler keyboard. No lengthy edits, just one take after the next, all captured on a handheld tape recorder in real time (along with some layered field recording from that evening). This was the result. I thought that I would share this here, along with some backstory for context.