____twoism

I believe that highly sensitive people are prone to get traumatized, in which case their sensory sensitivity is no longer going to be expressed to its full extent.

In that case... they are no longer effectively "highly sensitive" anymore. Maladaptive desensitization has taken over.

Anyone get my point? Unless someone is growing up in a highly - almost unreasonably - sheltered environment, the truly "highly sensitive" people would probably be ones that don't seem all that sensitive anymore.

Anyone...? Oh, okay...

My usual experience.

We live in traumatising times and it shouldn't be that way. People who are traumatised deserve sympathy of course. Maladaptation is adaption in the face of a lack of other healthier options for support.

But it's not everybody else's responsibility to deal with how maladaptive people process trauma. At some point it's on traumatised people to find other ways to process and heal.

A lot of people have trauma. Absence of visible maladaptation doesn't indicate absence of trauma. It might just be they've learnt to handle it or direct their maladaptation in less antisocial ways. That doesn't make them better, and it doesn't make people who aren't at that point worse.

There is nothing wrong with setting boundaries.

Negamuse wrote:We live in traumatising times and it shouldn't be that way. People who are traumatised deserve sympathy of course. Maladaptation is adaption in the face of a lack of other healthier options for support.

But it's not everybody else's responsibility to deal with how maladaptive people process trauma. At some point it's on traumatised people to find other ways to process and heal.

A lot of people have trauma. Absence of visible maladaptation doesn't indicate absence of trauma. It might just be they've learnt to handle it or direct their maladaptation in less antisocial ways. That doesn't make them better, and it doesn't make people who aren't at that point worse.

There is nothing wrong with setting boundaries.

Oh someone actually responded, nice. Yeah, I'm actually doing legitimate research on this which is going to help a lot of people but unfortunately I can't really mention anything about it. I don't want to link these kinds of social accounts to my real identity because I'm just savvy like that.

I really like your response though.

I must say I was very drunk though and was considering having this post deleted because it'll probably lead nowhere. It'll be read but nobody will have anything useful to say.


Why did I have to make this post here anyway?

Well, music means everything to me and and Boards of Canada happen to be my favorite musical act of all time. If they didn't exist, it'd be difficult to pick a favorite but then they came along and made it unequivocal for me.

Sorry, this is just actually very emotional to me.

I got into them as a teenager and was very curious about meeting other people who vibe with it. I have since then run into such people "in the wild" a couple of times and even introduced them to some people that I thought might like it.

"Oh yeah that's pretty nice. There's a hiphop beat. Cool beans. It's like weather channel music."

And not "OMG what is this genius sonic craftsmanship... this... wizardry? How are they doing it? Somehow tapping into some of my deepest, most personal and intimate emotional experiences?"

I've also had people who want to get into Boards of Canada because they like me so much and just can't really "get it" and it's just a little awkward.

I get it though, I mean there's music that takes you a while to unlock and when you do you understand the band a bit better and it makes them easier to appreciate.

And then there's music that does the same thing but it kind of unlocks something in yourself at the same time and those are the special ones. Not just music actually, I guess it works for a lot of things, people can be a bit like that. Funny actually talking about trauma in the first post, therapy can be the same, like you can resist thinking about a thing like "I am never going to understand this thing better" but the thing that causes the breakthroughs is when you understand yourself better, not the thing you're talking about

Does that sound wanky? Idk lol. But I really believe it happens like that. I have a really good friend who introduces me to a lot of music and I do the same to her. And I kind of held back on BoC and she held back on this artist that meant a lot to her, and it wasn't like "oh I don't want to show her this, what if she hates it" it's more like music that does that thing for you, it feels like it holds a bit of you in itself, it can feel very exposing to share.

Hey don't worry about posting drunk, I think we all have here (and still do haha). Be good to yourself

It's easier to keep people at bay than to let them get closer, see something they dislike (justifiably or not), and leave forever.

rodox_head wrote:It's easier to keep people at bay than to let them get closer, see something they dislike (justifiably or not), and leave forever.

That's a relatable thought.